Remember, if it's bigger than your elbow then don't put it up your butt. Unless you really want to I guess, whatever, I don't really care.

At doctor’s office: So what’s stuck in your butt this time?

Patient: My butt!?

Patient: Doctor, I am offended…

OFFENDED!

That you would just assume that I am here for butt related reasons.

Doc: Well, you’ve done it before.

Patient: So? What does it matter if I’ve had something stuck up my butt once or twice before?

Doc: Multiple times.

Patient: Whatever! The point is that I can still have non-butt related ailments.

Doc: Fine, I’m sorry.

Now, tell me what’s wrong with you.

Patient: It’s my peehole doc, I put worms in my peehole.